Thursday Fun: MamaKat’s Writers Workshop

It’s Writers Workshop day with MamaKat at MamaKat’s Losin It!

The Prompts for this week:

1.) Describe a moment when you realized you and your spouse were SO different.

2.) What is your role in the household?

3.) Write about how you felt when you discovered you were lied to.

4.) Describe a hard time you gave a teacher…what would you say to them today?

5.) What is an unpleasant experience you had eating? Write a poem, paragraph, or something else about the experience.

I kind of wanted to pick all of them this week, they were good.  But I already tend to be long winded (and this is no exception) so I’ll just stick with one.  I’m going to choose… number three.

Write about how you felt when you discovered you were lied to.

That is a difficult one to write about (but I like a challenge) simply because I’d have to pick one of the times I’ve been lied to.  There have been a few.  I think one time that sticks out fairly clearly in my mind is when I was 19 and my boyfriend (who lived two hours away, who was older than me, not creepy older but an out-of-college-had-a-career-and-owned-a-house kind of older, he pursued me by the way) told me he would be home with his guy friend all weekend.  My girlfriend and I decided we should go surprise him at his house in DC (I love DC).  I called him right before we left my friends house to confirm he and his friend really were going to be home and he once again said yes.  They planned to stay in and watch some sports and just hang out.  No plans at all he said.  Secretly I was giggling knowing how happy and surprised he’d be when I showed up at his door later that night.  It’d been two weeks since I’d been able to come down to see him with work and school being really busy (midterms you know?)

We hopped in my car and started our drive down I95 (you totally know where this is going don’t you?) when we finally reached his house it had become dark.  I parked across the street from his house and there were a few cars on the street, nothing out of the ordinary for the neighborhood, his driveway was empty.  

(My hearts beating like crazy just thinking about this as if I was really back in the moment.)

One thing you should know before the nitty gritty was this was the My First Love Guy.  Like I Love You. At 19 I thought You could possibly be It kind of thing.  Do you think he felt that way?   

I heard laughter as I walked up the driveway so we started around back and He came walking around the side of the house and saw me.  

Very much surprised.  Not very Happily as it turned out. 

He did a fairly good job of hiding it, but I knew him.  I had known him for five months.  He invited me and my friend inside ‘where a few people had gathered’ to watch the game.  Couples.  Funny how there were an even number of guys versus girls before my friend and I showed up.  Introduced us by names.  No titles (as in my Girlfriend…)

That’s odd, I thought most of the night as he didn’t sit next to me, nor talk to me, nor really acknowledge I existed.  

Embarrassed, yes, I think he was.  Because of my age?  I’ve always looked freakishly younger than I am.  I hear someday I’ll appreciate that.  Because he had other plans?  Hmmm.

I finally decided I’d had enough so after one of the girls said she was going to bed I told him my friend and I were going to go.  It was here that he pulled me into the hall and I got my first impulse ever to strike a guy.
Privately he asked me what the hell I was doing there.  I told him I came to see my boyfriend, shame he didn’t seem really happy about that.  I questioned him about why he told me he’d be just with his friend and when I showed up it seems he was having party.

He claimed it was spur of the moment.  He was angry at me and when I asked him why he said it was because everyone wanted to go out and he felt he couldn’t say anything because I was there. 
Ahh, so my not being 21 was the issue?  They couldn’t hit the bar (funny cause he didn’t drink.  Like not a drop at all.  Ever.)

I actually couldn’t think of anything to say I wanted to smack him.  So with tears in my eyes I walked away, asked my friend if she was ready and we left.  I spent the night in the hotel we stayed at very much awake and very much wondering what the heck was I going to do now. Of course he’d figured out where we were staying and called trying to get me to meet him and he apologized.  I told him to stuff it because Friend and I actually had planned to go to DC, not solely to see him.

So we had a great day, being Chicks on the mall and shopping and eating and just being weird college girls.

Needless to say my relationship didn’t last much longer after that.  I found out he loved me but wasn’t IN love with me (that one h u r t).  But the real kicker was I thought he was divorced.  Turns out he hadn’t been the entire time we’d been dating.  He was only separated from his wife.  Can I just say that I am so happy I never came across her at any point?  That would have been slightly awkward don’t you think?

Anyway, I guess I didn’t describe exactly how I felt about being lied to.  I told you a story instead.  But I felt like crap to know this person I’d fallen in love with was several things: ashamed of my age (he pursued me, asked for my number, harassed me to go out with him – not the other way around.  And I never lied about my age), embarrassed for me to meet his friends, and still married (separated or not, he should not have told me he was divorced when he wasn’t!).  I don’t know if I have ever felt so crushed by someone since.  It’s that ‘true first love life doesn’t get better than this’ feeling and then someone Shoves You Off A Cliff.  It took me a long time to get over that.  A long time people.

Anyway, if I haven’t bored you to death please go visit MamaKat and play along.  It’s lot’s of fun and can double as therapy if you play it right  😉

23 thoughts on “Thursday Fun: MamaKat’s Writers Workshop

  1. It is amazing the stories that some people think they can get away with and never face discovery. Inconvenient things like wives and other boy/girlfriends and …The older I get, the more I thing truthfulness is not as common as one would hope.


  2. I agree with Dan, it’s sad that the truth is harder to come by these days than a lie.That kinda of hurt stinks. Especially since he was the one doing the pursuing!


  3. Ah man – now that really sucks!!!It might be cliched to say it, but ALL your experiences make up the person you are today, so I try to be thankful even for the really awful ones.Honesty; it is such a big deal!!!!


  4. Awwww man, what a horrible way to learn the person you are dating is horrible. I’m just glad you didn’t walk in on him with another girl or something…that would have been really painful too.


  5. Visiting from Mama Kats…Although the details are different, at 19 I had a very similar and painful experience with a guy. I felt about him the way you described and the most painful thing he ever told me was that he viewed me a confidant and he loved me but not in that way. And this is all so fresh in my mind because a college friend of mine recently found him on Facebook and they were talking and she let me know and I sent him a friend request and he hasn’t responded back yet. And, deep deep down, some little part of me still hurts about that. Because he was the first Love of my life…and it just brings back all the awfulness I felt at the time. But I’m forever grateful he was that way because I’m SURE it would have been a horror show.good post. I feel your pain. : )


  6. Ouch! So sorry that you had to go through that one. Put me in the “me too” category. When I was around 19 I was dating this guy, I was in LOVE. We’d been dating about two years. I was at his house a lot and knew his parents pretty well. Then one time I called to talk to him, and his mom thought I was someone else. She was all sweet and “it was so nice to meet you Andrea! (my name is NOT Andrea) I’m glad that you came and spent the weekend with us. Darrin just thinks the world of you.” WTH? Yep, he had a sleepover with another girl and forgot to mention it to me. I drove over and broke up with him the next day. But it stung for a long time.


  7. Dan – Truthfulness is something that some people just lack I guess.Blue – It could have been bad. We actually became friends a year later, though we’ve lost contact since I got married. But I did actually meet his second wife and his daughter at an Army/Navy game :)Tabi – I agree!Queenie – You said it.Robin – Thanks. It killed me but I made it. It wouldn’t have worked out anyway.MamaKat – I might have had the strength to claw eyes out if I had (no, I’m such a wimp I probably would have apologized!)Jenners – Ouch! I completely feel your pain as well. I haven’t spoken to him in 7 years. We eventually parted as friends a year later though.Jamie – Sad how we all do don’t we?Shelle – I don’t know why he thought he could lie like that either. Maybe we could ask him to get flambéed on Venus! ;)CK – It’s a weekly thing at MamaKat’s. You should try it next week. I’ve become addicted!Adlibby – Owie! That would so suck. I can’t imagine that one.Crazy – I actually enjoyed writing it.Erin – Thank you 🙂


  8. Can I smack him? No really, can I? I guess we all have to go through something similiar to appreciate love & honesty in a relationship, but it sure does stink at the time. I might try MamaKat's Workshop next week…we'll see. Its a littl eintimidating with all of you fabulous writers! 😀


  9. I’m late to the party (as usual these days!) but want to chime in and say that a similar things happened to me with my first love at 18. We actually got back together senior year of college, GOT MARRIED, and then divorced when I realized that I’d been right the first time.So basically, just be glad you didn’t marry the jerk! 😉


  10. When I was in college, my girlfriend was a year older and had a great group of friends from her freshman dorm. She hung out with them separate from me. But we were “in love”. On her birthday I came over with pearl earrings. She was in the shower. Her roommate asked to see the gift. “Oh, Steve gave her pearl earrings, too!” she exclaimed. Turns out my girlfriend was seeing Steve (a guy from her freshman dorm) behind my back while she was dating me. After a bit of drama, we broke up.


  11. Kacey – I can’t see you smacking anyone, you’re too sweet! (But I’ll give you his address, email me ;)Natasha – Yikes! Glad you are out of that one and with a super sweetheart now.Dadshouse – Can I say ouch for you? Nothing like showing up with a really nice gift for the gf and finding out something like that.Ruby – I’m far better off.


  12. Kacey – I can't see you smacking anyone, you're too sweet! (But I'll give you his address, email me ;)Natasha – Yikes! Glad you are out of that one and with a super sweetheart now.Dadshouse – Can I say ouch for you? Nothing like showing up with a really nice gift for the gf and finding out something like that.Ruby – I'm far better off.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s