An open letter to my children

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Dear Children,

Happy Saturday! Aren’t you lucky you survived another week?! Aren’t I lucky I survived another week! Here’s the thing, it’s Saturday morning. I haven’t even had time to decide if I’m going to need another cup of coffee (it’s looking very likely at this point), but I’ve already had to ‘suggest’ several times that you leave each other alone.

Teen Boy, stop telling your little sister what to do, and how to do it. If she doesn’t know how to play whatever wii game she’s playing, let her figure it out on her own. We will all be much happier for it.

Chick, I get that you are only almost-nine, and for you that’s the trial of the century because your older brother Has Already Done Everything. Stop telling me that he’s better, smarter, more-awesome than you are. You know it’s not true and you are driving me Up The Wall saying it, and whinging, and crying over it.

A temporary single mother can only take so much.

I get that your dad is currently living thousands of miles away in London (I so wish we could reverse roles for a few weeks), and that we are moving thousands of miles away in two months (again), and that is scary/anxiety-filling/not-what-YOU-want, but it Is Happening. So figure out How-To-Deal-With-It. Because you are all making me nuts. Certifiably crazy cakes with your spring fever. Three cups of coffee on a good day, and a bottle of wine with binging on tv kind of crazy.

Please children, just chill, get along, don’t talk to each other, clean up after yourselves, don’t give me That Face when I ask you to do something, and above all Play Nicely.

Or mummy will go off the rails. I promise.

Much love and Kisses,

Mum

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